Dog at my heels....

Anxiety, a sense of dis ease can happen in a moment, or it can hang over - a cloud drunk with the troubles of the days gone by, the days to come. It whispers in my ear, like a spook in the corner.

My insides tighten up, a spring tightly wound.

These are the days I suffer from amnesia. I forget the goodness. I forget the blessings.

I snap at those I love. I hate that. I wish I wouldn`t do that.

What can I do?

I think about Molly.​

In our house we have a new puppy, only five months old. She is wildly enthusiastic, warmly affectionate and she follows me around my kitchen, dogs at my heels.

The cloud lifts, amnesia gives way to memory.

I suddenly remember hearing something Dallas Willard said when he was talking about the 23^rd Psalm, in his DVD discussing his book the Divine Conspiracy (a great read by the way). You know the verse (vs.6) that says -. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life...
He said, he thinks “that goodness and mercy are like little dogs at his heels,” they are always following him around.

Ah, I think to myself now, these wee dogs, goodness and mercy are following me always. Sometimes, I forget they are there. I fail to look over my shoulder – see them leaping, warmly and affectionately.

I forget my arithmetic, I forget to count my blessings, the ”goodness and mercy.”

Thank you for the phone call that came today offering more suggestions to help our girl.

Thank you for the sunshine that came glinting in my windows.

Thank you that we got to the orthodontist, to get that pesky retainer out – for now.

Thank you that our fridge is full and that we can eat – of plenty and often - when there so very many, many cannot.

Thank you for soft couch and Christmas cushions to rest my aching head.

Thank you for Friday nights spent with each other, just “chillin'.”

Thank you for laughter, clean and bright.

Goodness and mercy, following me, dogging at my heels.

“Woof, woof.”